AEROSMITH KICKS OFF NORTH AMERICAN TOUR
Who is that skinny chick onstage shrieking like a banshee? Is that Kate Moss? No, its Steven Tyler looking like a 97 pound runway model!
Aerosmith is on tour all summer with ZZ Top and on June 10th, St. Louis fans at Verizon Wireless Amphitheater played the role of guinea pigs for the opening night of the tour. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that ZZ Top was unavailable, so in their place fans were subjected to 3 Doors Down and the ticket prices still ranged from $40 to $200… by the way I skipped their set. It is very audacious for Aerosmith to still charge such extortionate ticket prices for a band that is a steaming pile compared to the legendary ZZ Top. Luckily, I was given free tickets or I would have blown off the concert all together since I have seen them twice before, and because Aerosmith‘s sellout attitude has continued to grind my last nerve.
I used to worship Aerosmith. In the 70’s, Aerosmith was the quintessential hard rock band with a blistering catalogue of music. Out of fear of extinction, Aerosmith hired songwriters in the 80’s to bring them back into the limelight. Songs like “Rag Doll” and “Dude (Looks Like A Lady)” are fun and poppy, but they are more Poison sounding than vintage Aerosmith. And, don’t even get me started on that insufferable ballad they did for the Armageddon soundtrack that sounds like a salute to Celine Dion.
At about 8:55 pm, five minutes before show time, venue management advised everyone to return to their cars due to severe lightning and tune our radios to KMOX and await further instructions. Instead of listening to the radio, my buddy and I patiently waited for the show to begin by rocking out to Motley Crue‘s ‘Shout At The Devil’ album. The sky was on fire with bolts of lightning, so at about 10pm we decided Aerosmith would never go on and drove off. Luckily, I stopped at the nearby gas station because I am hooked on Slushees. The gas station announced that Aerosmith would take the stage in fifteen minutes so we hurried back to the venue. The band opened with “Monkey On My Back” and immediately delighted the rain soaked crowd with “Cryin'”, “Love In An Elevator” and “Dream On”. They then announced they would be playing a song they had never performed live before so I was ecstatic to be apart of the virgin experience. Too bad they let Joe Perry sing “Combination” because it did not sound too great.
Aerosmith is giving back to the diehard fans on this tour by playing their iconic ‘Toys In The Attic’ album front to back this tour. Unfortunately, they did not keep their promise, because Aerosmith left off “You See Me Crying”. Who wants to sue them with me for false advertisement? However, songs like “Toys In The Attic”, “Walk This Way”, “Sweet Emotion”, “Big Ten Inch Record”, “Round And Round” and the highlight of the evening, “No More No More”, rocked hardcore.
A security guard told me that Aerosmith was supposed to play from 9pm until 11:15pm. So, when the show ended at 11:30pm after starting at about 10:20pm, concert goers rightfully felt ripped off. Aerosmith should have rescheduled the concert (they had 3 days in between their next gig) or refunded half of the ticket price since they gave a half-a#%ed performance. What’s really tacky about the whole fiasco is that the weather cleared up just fine right when Aerosmith started to hit their stride and they still opted to give us an abridged performance. Also, since they obviously planned on a short set they should have canned the filler song “Combination” and their strategic product placement of Joe Perry squaring off in a solo competition against his ‘Aerosmith: Guitar Hero’ character. Watching Joe Perry challenge a fake Joe Perry was ridiculous and I would have preferred to see Perry pull out an old Atari 2600 and simply play a round of Q Bert.
Joe Perry said that ‘Guitar Hero’ is cool, but there’s nothing like the real thing – he forgot to add, “But make sure to keep buying our game.”